Some prove the bridal maidenhead with a blood-smeared sheet.
Some say water’s holy. Others worship wheat.
Only priests may frighten girls. Only boys may speak of winter.
We enforce a prohibition on text messaging at dinner.
Parmenides, a filthy Greek, proposed the world is round.
Satan comes as smokeless fire. My couch screams middlebrow.
You’ve got to try my energy bar. We call our moon the moon.
Each stroke of the mapmaker’s pen describes a fresh misfortune.
Their parliamentary process is based on how they feel.
We burn a flag that touched the earth. His abs are just unreal.
Don’t joke about the zodiac. Stop thinking with your dick.
It seems, said Ms. Anderson-Holt, your daughter is dyslexic.
An ancestor’s unhappy ghost has soured our well with tears.
Thank God for Mississippi. Thank God for low-carb beers.
Place a crystal in the desert. Seek and ye shall find.
Some consider orgasm an omen of a kind.
The modern age begins with two hysterics: Don Quixote and Luther.
A philosophy of violence has taken root there.
Five or six poppin’ and six or five droppin’. All is one.
Odysseus carried his oar where no one knew the ocean.
Those who have clean sheets will want to make them dirty.
Today I’m Palestinian, tomorrow I’m Israeli.